My son’s vocabulary isn’t extensive enough to express everything he wants to say at the age of just under two. He’s progressing, and as my fellow parents will attest, it’s adorably adorable and fascinating to watch him pick up new words and incorporate them into his constantly expanding vocabulary.
I’m asking him questions he’s not yet prepared to answer, pointing out things in the room he doesn’t recognize, and regularly introducing new ideas.
One of those ideas is expressing regret, and as a mother who commits many errors, I have given my son many chances to learn how to do so. The truth is that there are times when a parent should apologize to their child, and your child can learn a lot from you when you act like a grown-up and express regret.
I personally believe that if and when I make a mistake, I should admit it and ask for forgiveness from a toddler who is already too preoccupied with cheese to even notice that I’m talking to him. I want him to understand this idea completely so that he will be able to accept responsibility for his mistakes when the inevitable moment arrives. In addition, I want my son to understand that he is respected enough to accept an apology from someone in authority, even and especially in those cases. And I won’t be apologizing for any other situations that might cause my son to become upset or angry. He doesn’t understand, so he will get upset when I do something that is really for his advantage. He won’t get an “I’m sorry” from me in those situations. In all honesty, parenting is a balancing act that, while occasionally exhausting, is also extremely helpful and advantageous for everyone involved.
Here are 11 situations in which you should without a doubt apologize to your child and a few situations in which you shouldn’t. Making mistakes and apologizing doesn’t have to be the worst thing because, as parents, we aren’t perfect and with every flaw comes a chance to teach our children something.
When You Misunderstand Their Snuggle Cues.
Numerous times, I’ve assumed my son wanted to cuddle because of the adorable way he was sleeping, reaching for me, or otherwise acting as though cuddles are something he definitely wants, only to find out that he doesn’t want to be touched at all. I firmly believe that my son (and everyone else, for that matter) should have total control over their bodies, so I should sincerely apologize when I cross a line without realizing it.
When you consume the food that they were unquestionably going to consume.
I don’t know about you, but if I take that last chicken nugget off of my kid’s plate after he ate everything else around it haphazardly for fifteen minutes, he will be the most upset. It’s not like I’m stealing my kids’ food on purpose, but it could happen, and if it does, I’ll apologize.
When You Smash One Of Their Favorite Toys.
They’re for kids who like to throw things and test things, so why, toy manufacturers, do they make kids’ toys that are so damn breakable in the first place?
When, in spite of their amazing communication skills, you fail to notice the obvious thing they are asking for.
Oh, of course you want the open fruit pouch on the counter, not the stuffed elephant, the four board books, the pacifier, or the milk I offered you. Oops. I apologize for that.
When you have to stop watching their favorite YouTube video for the sake of your own sanity because you simply cannot handle another minute of it.
We monitor screen time carefully, so I have to admit that I don’t always apologize for this one. I also don’t want him to feel entitled to it or like it’s an ongoing, necessary part of his daily routine. But really, when he’s being laid back and nowhere near his screen limit, and I’m only refusing because it’s driving me crazy, well, sometimes I act a little sheepish.
If You Offend Their Emotions.
Guys, I’m prepared for this one. I believe it’s only a matter of time before I accidentally make my toddler feel anything other than blissfully happy. My toddler is only just starting to show signs of having all the feels. When that inevitable day arrives, I will undoubtedly be sincerely sorry and, you know, probably drowning in that dreaded mom-guilt that I can never seem to get rid of.
When you are preoccupied with how tall you can build this block tower and fail to notice that your companions are bored and not doing anything else.
Oh, right. I should probably make sure you participate in the play as well. Dear son, I apologize.
When the snacks are still at home.
No words can adequately convey the regret I am currently experiencing. I am the one who is supposed to give my child food because I know he is hungry and is asking me for something to eat. The worst, in fact.
When They Wanted To See The Garbage Truck Drive By The Window But You Were Too Slow To Lift Them Up And All They Caught Were Tail Lights At The End Of The Block.
I apologize, son. Holy hell you are getting way too heavy for me to lift you up without first considering proper posture and lifting with my knees and not my back and, okay, I am just too old for this. Mom will start working out so this doesn’t happen again.